You be The Judge

You be The Judge

In 2009 I drove to my girl’s school to pick them up. When I was going I drove at a normal speed. But after picking them up, I forgot that the school zone speed dropped to 20 mph. Still I wasn’t speeding or anything like that because of how busy it was, I drove 21 mph.

The police came behind me with their siren on. I was still crossing the school and was by an alley where all the school busses come in to pick up the kids. There was lots of traffic and he wanted me to turn into the bus line so I did.  He said I was going over the speed limit and gave me the speeding in school zone ticket. I was mad. You know how the police always wait for you to leave after giving the ticket and then they leave; well this police officer didn’t do that. As soon as he gave me the ticket he zoomed his car in front of mine and left. When I was about to leave I noticed that I couldn’t back up due to traffic but there were lots of busses parked in front me. I was so mad and frustrated and wanted to get home as soon as I could. I couldn’t see if the busses flags were out or not.  I did the same thing that the police officer did. My mental condition was bad because I couldn’t believe I got a speeding ticket. I was so angry and frustrated because he sad that I would have to go to court for it as well. Oh great is what I thought.

I got home and sat down, took a deep breath and starting thinking about where am I going to get the money for the ticket? Half an hour later my daughter came to my room and asked me in a nervous voice if I could take her to practice. I didn’t feel like driving ever again, but twenty minutes later I was on the road again, taking care of my responsibilities. After I dropped her off, my youngest daughter called me on my cell phone. As soon as I picked it up, she sounded very scared. I asked her, “what’s wrong” and she said, “The police is here”.  My heart dropped, I was already pretty mad at the ticket now what? I told her, “I am on my way home but what did he want?” She said, “He wants to talk to you and he says he is going to wait for you outside”. I said, to her. “No matter what don’t open the door”.  I don’t remember how I drove home, thinking my child is home alone and the police is outside of my door. I hope it’s not bad news.

As soon as I turned into my driveway, I saw the same police officer who gave me a speeding ticket standing in my driveway. I came out from my car, walked by him and asked him, “now what”? He could tell by my face I was mad. He asked me if after I gave you the ticket did you back up and leave or did you drive through the alley? I said, “I drove through the alley. Why? He said, “Did you see the buses were standing there? I said yes. Then he asked me if I saw that the flags were out. I said, “I honestly don’t remember”. I was so angry and wanted to go home. I didn’t focus. He said, “After you left I got a call from the school. One of the bus driver’s told the principal who saw you passing the school bus while the flag was out.”  My blood pressure was getting higher and higher. I looked at him and said, “Are you serious, that’s why you came to my door.” He looked at me and then I said, “Are you going to give me another ticket”. I got two big tickets on the same day.  I don’t have words to describe how I was feeling that day.  Yes, it was my fault.  I take my responsibility and I am not proud of it. But I didn’t do it on purpose. I paid lots of money for those two tickets.

Being a single parent is hard enough but when these kinds of things happen it adds up. Money is another issue that a single parent has to deal with. It is very stressful and many times very painful.

When my oldest daughter turned 16 and got her license, her father gave her his old truck to drive. Last year her truck started having lots of issues and at some point we had to get rid of it. But then all three of us were depending on one car. The girls have to be at school around 8:00 AM and I have to be at work a little before 8:00 AM. Three months ago one morning just like many mornings, all of us were hurrying to get to school and work on time, depending on one car. We were running late and had to drop the girls off first so then I can go to work. I drove more than 2O mph. Here we are getting late and the police came behind us and stopped us. The funny thing is that it was the same police officer from before. I tried to talk to him and explain why I was rushing and to please give me the warning but not a ticket, he didn’t care. He gave me a ticket and I was supposed to go to court for that too. This time I knew it would be more than I paid the first time. I didn’t know what to do. So I called my lawyer friend and told her what happened and how she can help me.

 Today was my court date and I had to pay $ 1100.  It is a lot of money for me to pay. I wanted to talk to the Judge and explain. Yes I am guilty for speeding, but you should also know why I was speeding. Not for fun but to be a responsible mother who was rushing to drop her daughters to school on time and be at work on time for her family. Instead of just focusing on the speeding ticket also look at the person’s character too. I am an American Citizen, I pay taxes, I pay my bills on time, I don’t take drugs, alcohol, abuse my kids, or am bad mother. I am a good person, educated and a single parent of two; I take care of them as best as I can. I asked my lawyer friend if it would help if I talked to him, she said there was no point. He would only look at if you broke the law or not. And if you did that there is nothing to talk about, those are your consequences. I understood her but don’t agree with her.

 When I was leaving from the court house and driving back home, I was thinking about how hard it is to do the right thing. I am all by myself, and trying to do the right thing. Everyone has flaws; I guess driving over the speed limit is my down side. But I don’t understand this system, if someone is already struggling and fighting with life and trying to make it better for herself and her daughters, punishing her with money doesn’t solve anything. It actually adds more stress. What about community services or class. I didn’t get offered anything. Honestly it seemed to me that all that they care for is money. Negative thoughts were coming into my mind too. Maybe it would be better if I was not a good person and was doing bad things. I wonder how that would be. Being a good citizen and doing the right thing only makes us struggle more and causes stress, it adds more problems. Is this what good people’s lives should be?