Since February is my birth month, I have decided this month I am going to focus on freedom. Freedom can be different for every individual. In this article I am going to write three different generations’ freedom. First I want to introduce you to someone; his name is Rati Dutta. Last summer my daughter and I went to cost cutters to get our hair cut. My daughter was getting hers done and while I was waiting I called a friend and we were talking in Urdu (Pakistani native language) . The door opened. and I looked up and I saw an older Indian man walking in. I kept talking to my friend. He sat next to me and said to me something to me in Urdu. I looked up and he was looking at me. I said goodbye to my friend and then I asked him, “Do you speak Urdu”? He replied, “I speak five languages”. I said “Wow that’s impressive”. He didn’t seem shy at all. We talked with each other for a very short time. And then it was my turn to get a haircut and I had to say goodbye to him. He gave me his card before I left. There was something different about Rati Dutta. He left a very nice, positive, and educational impression with me.
A few weeks later I sent an email to him and asked him if he would like to meet with me for coffee. He was up for it. We met at the coffee shop. Since then we have been meeting and getting to know more about each other's lives. I call him Uncle Rati. From the cultural perspective it’s very impolite to call your elders by their name. And he calls me, daughter. I haven’t met anyone who could impress me that much before. Last week when we met, I was already thinking about freedom and so I decided to interview him for this column. I am writing about three generations of freedom. Uncle Rati’s , mine and my daughter to see how different each generation looks at freedom and do we really know the real meaning of the freedom.
Name: Rati K. Dutta
Age: 79
Birth country: Kolkata, India
Profession: Medical Doctor
Name: Zainab Susi
Age: 43
Birth country: Karachi, Pakistan
Profession: Teaching assistant
Name: Herrah Hussain
Age: 19
Birth county: Illinois USA
Profession: Students
Rati Dutta was born in 1936 in Kolkatha, India. I asked him “How was your childhood”? He said to me, he grew up under extreme poverty. He had 25 family members living with him in the small home. He has seven brothers, and three sisters. He didn’t have water and food growing up. When I asked him about electricity? He laughed and said, “You can live without electric but not without food and water”. When he was 8 years old, he met Gandhi. This was the first time Gandhi came to Kolkata. Something inside of him told him he didn’t want to live in poverty. After he finished high school he decided to go to medical school and become a Medical Doctor. He also wanted to learn English, so during his time at medical school in India he applied to go to London, and they gave him the visa to come to London to learn English. He told me during that time the plane ticket from India to London was only $70 dollars. When he said that, I couldn’t believe it. I looked at him with a surprised face and then him and I both laughed hard. He was 23 years old when he left his country for a better life. While he was learning English, he also got his M.B.B.S, M.D, F.R.C.S.:M.R.C.O.G: degrees. He speaks many languages and he is full of knowledge at the age of 79. He even remembers events with their dates and years.
At the hospital he was working at, he met a white British woman; she was working as a secretary. In 1964 she became his wife and had two kids together. I asked him, the culture you and I both are from and especially during that time how did your family and friends react when you told them about your future wife, who was white and British?” He said, “Nobody was happy but I felt strongly about her and I picked love”. He also said that, “All of my colleagues who were Indian Doctors, they all went to India and got married to Indian brides”. He wanted to pick his own life partner. After 51 years later they are still married to each other. I asked him if he could start it all over again would he move to London and pick the same woman again? He said, “Yes”. January,1 1971 the entire family moved to the States. First they moved to New York and then later Uncle Rati and his wife moved to Champaign. His kids are older and are living their own lives. He also has grandkids.
He told me he also had met John F Kennedy and he has so much respect for President Lincoln. He added, “He is the man who spoke perfect English”. Uncle Rati is a well educated doctor and you can talk to him about any topic and he will talk back with you with full knowledge. I also noticed something about him so I asked him, “I noticed that you walk straight. How can you walk straight at the age of 79?” He answered me back, “I only eat natural food. I keep my mind active by reading and getting more knowledge.” At age of 79 he is still driving, he uses his cell phone and even emails. He still travels not just from state to state but to overseas. He dresses very business like and he respects other’s opinion and cares deeply about everyone else. After meeting with him and asking all those questions he made me think, he is a real testimony for all of us. He didn’t have anything when he started. He told me when he went to London he only had $20.00 with me. But he had a vision and hope for a better life and a better future for him and for his kids . Throughout his journey he wanted to live his life how he wanted to full of freedom and he did it. I feel blessed and lucky I got the chance to meet Uncle Rati Dutta.
Zainab Susi
My life is divided into three parts. The first part is from my birth to when I turned eighteen in Karachi. Those eighteen years of my life I had lots of dreams but I didn’t see any possible way to achieve them. There was so much struggle and worrying about tomorrow. I pretty much lived that part of my life day by day without knowing where I was heading or who I was. I did everything I was told to do, not what I wanted to do. I didn’t have a normal childhood or even adolescent. Due to the family situation I had to become an adult when I was just a child.
My 2nd part of life started when I first moved to the States in 1999 to 2002. I never thought I would move from Karachi but you never know. I moved to a brand new country with brand new people. It took me a while to realize that this is my home now and there was no turning back. Was I happy? I don’t have an answer for that because my happiness was and still is with my family. But I remember many times when I called my mom and sisters as soon as I heard their voices tears started rolling down my cheeks and I so wanted to be with them. But I had to tell myself my life is where my husband lives. And he is my first family now. And that’s how I grew up.
I was born in Pakistan and I will always will be recognized as a Pakistani. Even though I had to let go of my birth country nationality and become a U.S Citizen. Even today after 25 years later living in the states people still ask me, where are you from? Yes, my skin is brown and my hair is black I speak Urdu but I have no connection with Pakistan anymore besides having family living there. Every time I go back home I feel like a foreigner in my own birth country. The United States gave me citizenship but people don’t look at me as American. Many times I wonder, where do I belong? Whether I wanted to or not I accepted my new life as I have chosen it. I forgot about myself or my dreams but invested into my family because that’s what I was supposed to do. The two best things happened to me during this time and it is I became a mother of my beautiful girls. That time I was a stay at home wife and a Mom. And I was busy taking care of my family’s needs. This part of life ended when I got divorced. And then the new chapter started and this is the 3rd part of my life until now.
At this point I was all-alone. I never thought that someday I would get a divorce. During the early beginning stages of my divorce I had to chose if I wanted to stay there and feel pity for myself or start crawling without knowing where I was going and chose not to feel sorry for myself but use this hard time as my strength and I started looking at the glass like it was half full. And living in The United States made me realize people come to this country all over the world for freedom and I am already living here. Slowly but surely I started making my own life decisions. And each step I took led me to another and that’s how I made it this far as a single Pakistani born woman.
Two years ago, when my youngest daughter moved out for university she made my home empty. But soon after my Mother got sick my attention became devoted to her. Even though she was in Karachi and I was here, my mind was with her 24/7. Only 8 months ago when she passed away and I came back to the United States from Karachi I felt completely lost. I didn’t know where to start, I felt like a lost soul. I realized I got so used to taking care of others and now I didn’t have anyone to take care of and that was the part that was bothering me. I also realized I didn’t know what it felt like to be normal I went through intense therapy and knew I had to let go of my past completely and to stop worrying or looking forward to the future because what I have is just today. By doing that I felt so much lighter, I felt like I started living again but this time I am living with freedom and to me freedom is living. I never got the chance to take care myself while feeling full freedom. I am talking about freedom from physical freedom and mental freedom. Where you decide whatever and however you want to live your life. Where you are not controlled by anyone and I mean anyone. And you feel complete and whole within yourself. It’s a priceless feeling. Without having any kind of security I feel secure within myself.
My freedom is different than Uncle Rati’s freedom. I didn’t have a choice but to accept my past life. But I am excited and feel complete about my present time. It’s a great place to be and that is freedom to me and freedom is living!
Herrah Hussain
“My childhood was happy and full of laughter. Growing up my memories consist of my Mother and my Sister. I don’t have many memories with my Dad unfortunately. I grew up in an open-minded household. I had no issues asking my Mom anything. I most definitely grew up having full freedom. Freedom to me is expressing myself however I want, such as speaking my mind. I had full freedom about whatever and however I wanted to wear to how to eat and sit. Choosing to attend Loyola University in Chicago was not an easy choice, I had to pick between staying close to my home or moving to the city. But after reading more about the University I saw how many doors would open for me. I would have the freedom to do so much than I could ever imagine. I didn’t have to worry about my Mom saying no to my decision, she will support whatever decision I make. I most definitely believe I am living with full freedom. I have the freedom to choose my major, my friends, and to do what I want with my life. When I think about what my Mom was like when she was my age, I can’t imagine being in that position. I know I couldn’t marry at that young of an age to someone I don’t know very well. I am lucky to be born in The United States of America, where there are so many opportunities for me. I strongly believe freedom is living.”
Three different generations with three different lifestyles and different consequences but the same goal, FREEDOM! I believe every single human all over the world whether she or he is living in the village of Pakistan or living in an advanced country, it doesn’t matter. Everyone has the right to live free and to me freedom is living! Ask your self that, Are you living your life with freedom? 