My grandmother (I called her Manoo) is physically gone but I feel that she is still with us. I know she will always be with me, guiding me through my everyday decisions.
My name is Mahwish and I came to Manoo’s home in 1997, after I lost my father. I always thought that having a father was very important because he is the backbone of the family. Once he left it was very hard for me to accept that he was gone. Manoo helped with the transition by telling me her life stories during her free time. One day she told me a story about her father, and that gave me comfort. Her father, my great grandfather, was in the army and he fought in World War II. Manoo and her family lived without him while he was gone, without knowing when he would come back. While I was listening to her telling me this story, I was surprised that she survived without a father when she was just a child. Later during the partition her entire family moved to Pakistan from India and soon after she got married. At the beginning she was happy with her husband but her in-laws weren’t kind people and acted negatively towards her. Then suddenly her husband died of a heart attack and her in-laws became more negative towards her and it was very difficult for her to live with them.
During my childhood I always saw her busy with her prayers. She was always reciting the Quran and was pleased when my sister and I recited it as well. She always sat with us and listened to us very intently. She always encouraged us to get more education, when we received good grades she looked very happy.
I always loved to watch Pakistan’s cricket match but Manoo was always against cricket, and she disliked watching TV dramas. She enjoyed listening to the news, shows about the economy, and Islamic programs. But later on she started showing interest in cricket matches and TV dramas too. Everybody said to her, “Your granddaughters changed you”, she always smiled and said they are the beauties of my life.
In April 2013 she had a massive stoke. It was my first time dealing with a stroke patient. I remember it very well, around 4pm I came out from the shower and saw her sitting on the floor. Her face looked stressed and she was unable to communicate. At that time I didn’t know she was having a stroke. She was not in control and her vitals were shutting down. I lifted her into my arms and helped her reach the bed to make sure she was ok. At that time I was home alone. Shortly after my mom and sister came back home, my mother looked at her and right away she knew something was wrong. We took her to the hospital to get treated.
She started seeing a therapist and made some progress. I watched her therapist and paid attention to the exercises he was doing with her, later I learned them and started doing them for her myself. In the beginning I was very nervous but the more I tried I got more confident. With the therapy and everyone’s help she was able to sit in a wheelchair, and showed huge progress. In December of 2013 she had another stroke, and from there she started to deteriorate. In May of 2014 with many health complications, she started having fevers reaching 105 degrees. Twenty-two days before she passed she went into a vegetative coma. The interesting part of this type of coma is that the patient can open their eyes, and even say some words. However they aren’t actually awake. The longer the patient stays in a vegetative state, the chances of waking up become less and less.
On June 14, 2014 she left us. I pray that Allah swt gives her the best place in Heaven. I love her a lot and I will always miss her. It still feels as though this is all unreal and it is hard to believe she is gone forever. But I know she is in a better place, and I have no doubt she is very happy there. No matter what she is a part of me and I will carry her with many all through my life.
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