Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Red belt

                                                   Red belt 

--  Many years ago I signed up for Taekwondo classes for both of my girls. After a couple of months, one day when I was sitting on the side watching them I decided to also take taekwondo class with my girls and this way it would be good for the whole family. I talked to the instructor and before I knew it I was wearing a black uniform with a white belt. My girls and I truly enjoyed taking class together. We practiced at home together and it was a lot of fun. We were learning something new and were getting our exercise too.
            The taekwondo class is taught at the mosque (Islamic center), and the instructor is Hany Youssef. He is a very well educated, respectful, family man and a very understanding and dedicated person. When I first started taking Taekwondo I had to face lots of challenges and it’s sad to say it was all from the Pakistani/Muslim community. Since I am a woman and divorced people didn’t like me taking Taekwondo class with other men and especially from an instructor who was also male. The remarks I heard about me from them wasn’t very pleasant, at first it bothered me but I knew I wasn’t doing anything wrong. Who cares what they thought, my girls and I were gaining from it not losing anything so I kept moving on. I did talk to my instructor about it, since he also understands the culture. He supported me 100% and that gave me confidence as well.
            I signed up for my girls so they could have confidence in them, which they did. Getting the next belt was another goal for them, but for me it wasn’t about the next belt but to exercise and learn Taekwondo. Due to different life circumstances many times we had to stop going, but we always came back. But I noticed that when I stopped going, I truly missed Taekwondo and couldn’t wait to go back. When my girls reached high school they couldn’t keep up Taekwondo and with their schoolwork and other activities so they decided to quit. But I kept going. Every six months or so we would have the next belt exam and I always though of myself as not being good enough to reach the next level. So I told myself that I wasn’t here for the belt but for exercise and self-defense. But the belt exam is part of the practice. The instructor is always watching and he knows the qualifications I have. Somehow to this day, I have never failed a belt exam.
            Last week we had another belt exam and once again I was doubting myself because recently I wasn’t able to go often due to life situations. But my instructor gave me confidence and I took the exam with the mentality that this is about seeing what I’ve learned not about what I haven’t learned. A few days ago I got an mail from him and when I saw my name stating that I have earned my next belt, the Red Belt,I was overcome with joy. I am one step away from a black belt. I couldn’t believe I have had come that far. When I first started Taekwondo it was for a different reason but today many years later I can see how much Taekwondo has change me from inside to outside. I am not dedicated to the point that I would like to be but I am proud to say Taekwondo has become part of my life. I know that just because I have higher belt doesn’t mean I know everything or if I know how to do it, it doesn’t mean I am really good at it. No, I have to practice a lot and still have long way to go. And my instructor always says speed and focus creates a power and speed comes from the practice. Any martial art is about practice and if we don’t practice we lose it. 
            I guess my whole idea of writing about my story is as long as you keep moving on, you will start seeing good results sometime it takes time but hard work always pays off. And the joy we received from it is indescribable. It doesn’t matter what your gender is as long as you work hard and prove. And when you are proud of yourself others will see and feel it too. Whatever you’re doing whether it’s taking classes, a job, raising kids or anything else, put your heart into it and you will succeed. I believe support system is also very important. It was my instructor’s positive attitude that made me feel comfortable and every time I went back I felt like I was welcomed home. I feel blessed and lucky.
“We learn martial arts as helping weakness. You never fight for people to get hurt. You're always helping people”.

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