A Good Man!

It has been almost 20 years or more, when I first met my ex-husband’s friend and his family. His name is Ahson Rafi and he also happens to be Pakistani. I call him Ahson bhai because Bhai means big brother. Ahson bhai and my ex-husband were working for the same company but in different states.  He was living in Minnesota and we were in Illinois. He invited us to his home and that’s when I met his wife, kids and his mother. There was something about all of us, we all clicked with each in no time except his wife. She wasn’t mean or anything but wasn’t that friendly. We visited each other’s home many times and became like family. We all had a great time and felt like we had known each other for a long time. When I had my 2^nd daughter Ahson bhai named her.

            After I got divorced, I completely lost contact with them because it was through with my ex-husband. I thought about them many times and wished we were still in contact but years just went by. Two weekends ago, I went to Bloomington to pickup my daughter from her Dad’s place. On my way my daughter called me and said, “Mom, I don’t know if you remember one of Dad’s old friend or not but I think you do. He is here visiting”. I asked her his name and was very surprised to hear his name. Without thinking about how he feels about me, especially because of the divorce, I asked my daughter to go tell him I am on my way to pick you up and if it’s okay with him I would like to say hello to him.

            Once I arrived, before I came out from the car he came outside and the amount of respect he showed towards me is indescribable. I was very happy to see him as well. He told me 7 years ago he got divorced but last year he got re-married. I was so happy for him. He is a very nice, caring, loving man. Then he told me he doesn’t live in Minnesota anymore and is now living in Bloomington, Illinois. 

            I was surprised. He told me he became the Director of Operations and we wanted to talk more but time was limited. He invited us to have lunch with him. Two days later my daughter and I went to Olive garden in Champaign, we met around 12:30 PM and talked until 3:30 PM. He is like my big brother but also my friend. We both felt like we had a lot to catch up and had a great talk. He told his mother about me and she was also very happy. Two days later I called his mother and we picked it up where we left it 20 years ago. It was really nice talking to her, she is like my own mother and I have so much respect for her.  She even said to me, “I thought of you many times and God wanted us to reunite again and we did.” She invited me to her home and soon my plan is to go and visit her.

            My point of writing this story is that some people leave a big mark on our heart; they are very special people and truly care for friendship. There is a lot to say about Ahson bhai but if I make it short, I have seen him finding a balance between, family and work and the way he did it only he knows. He raised his three boys pretty much on his own, he tried to save his marriage but at some point he learned to let it go. The way he has been taking care of his mother, I don’t know if any other man can do that. He is very respectful and obedient toward her. He has received many opportunities to promote to a higher position but due to his family responsibilities he has rejected them. He never put his work or money first but rather his family. He told me it was his Mother’s blessing to get married again and take this Director of Operation for Olive Garden position. Finding a balance is very important in life and that’s the only way we can succeed. Ahson bhai seems very happy and satisfied. I also talked to a few employees at Olive garden and they told me he is a great boss.  He is humble, funny and very caring. When we had lunch I noticed he didn’t talk to me about his job but about his family. I wish him all the happiness in the world!

            I feel blessed and very lucky to have a friend like Ahson bhai and his family. Since I am not his friend’s wife anymore he didn’t have to talk to me at all. But he still gave me the same respect he showed me before. I really respect that. And respect is something that means a lot to me. I wish him all the best and hope from now our friendship will grow more.